Lost in Translation
One naturally tries to understand new surroundings by first, sieving through his database of contextual knowledge. In a foreign environment, he frantically tries to find any sort of foothold, an anchor point, from which he can make sense of the place. He becomes a point of reference, tapping on past experiences or encounters, to help him find patterns within the environment not unlike those found at home or places elsewhere to establish a familiarity, a relationship between himself and this foreign environment.
I came to Ban Panthom with a preconceived idea of what the enclave was like, or rather what I wanted it to be. Seeking out parallels between the community and others like it, I started developing an understanding that was skewed because I only focused on observing things that corroborated the narrative I wanted to tell.
The language barrier further bolstered a hesitancy that distanced me from interacting with the community. I wanted to hear specific, maybe even staged, comments from the people but having two levels of separation (the need for my thoughts to be translated to the community and vice versa by a third party) made this process painfully slow. I must admit, at this stage, there was a tendency to make assumptions of the community.
Trying to convince others of this superimposed view onto the community of Ban Panthom was arduous, to say the least. The students from Chulalongkorn definitely do not have the same database of experiences to understand my point of view naturally. What I had to say seemed to make little sense because there was no context to relate my views and suggestions to the local people. It was funny to constantly see my group members conversing in Thai amongst themselves to clarify what I had just said and come up with a collective reply. I was not always sure if they’ve understood what I was trying to say.
However, it was this lack of organicity that exposed the flaws of the research focus I had set for myself at Ban Panthom. The fact that there was doubt and hesitancy to pursue this line of research undermined my hypothesis and assumptions of the community. I was forced to take multiple steps back, take a really good look and observe Ban Panthom for what it was without any presumptions and expectations. In fact, I was presented with the opportunity to appreciate and enjoy the community for what it is without the thought of looking for a particular answer haunting the back of my head.
I got to play with the kids, banter with the people there and experience how accommodating the community is. There was a closeness, a realness that was heartwarming and that made me realise that the start to understanding the community is to enjoy it, not to study in an analytical way based on a preconceived idea. One might say that being lost allowed me to pass through the front gate into Ban Panthom.
